I have been working with a couple of groups over the past 2 weeks where we have been exploring giving and receiving compliments as a strategy towards the social skill goal of getting along with others. Reflection from working with these wonderful and optimistic students has reinforced a simple idea but critically important social skill, that acts of kindness like the giving of a compliment have the amazing quality of transmitting happiness to others. When you are nice to someone their response creates a feedback loop that creates more good feelings in you.
Being kind to others is an act of kindness to yourself! Many of the students felt shy initially to give compliments to others, for the fear of rejection or others being jealous. We decided that giving compliments is like friendship, a gift that you give freely. No-one should make you feel bad about being nice to others. This conversation made me think of the poster quote on the wall of the Counselor’s Hub (“Do everything with a good heart and expect nothing in return and you will never be disappointed”) anon
After discussion it was apparent that social skills are just that, a skill, an intention, a positive mindset that like any skill needs to be developed and improves with practice. The more we practice the better we get and develop the habit of a growth mindset. In return we inject some happiness in our own lives as the happiness loops around. Win, win!
Who will you compliment this week? Have a go you might just be surprised by the result.
Should you have any concerns, please contact School Counselor Ken at firstname.lastname@example.org